The Rabid Conservative

Think Right, Act Right, Be Right.

Fat Kid Jimmy or Ali Al Kaboom

with one comment


This just has to be one of the most ridiculous things I’ve ever heard.

Yesterday, Michelle “First Time” Obama*, rolling out ObamAd Inc’s new initiative has unilaterally said that fat people are a threat to National Security.

“A recent study put the health care cost of obesity-related diseases at $147 billion a year, this epidemic also impacts the nation’s security, as obesity is now one of the most common disqualifiers for military service.”

What “First Time” doesn’t get is that why we have to have a military in the first place, because we have people in this world who want to bring harm to this country and the people in it.  Rather than actually go after the real reason why we have National Security issues, that is, because we have terrorists smuggling bombs in their underwear, shoes, bras, or whatever, Michelle is railing on fat kids.  While she mentions obesity, the Let’s Move program is aimed specifically at obese children in public schools.

There was always one fat kid in school that got picked on.  Maybe his name was Billy, Timmy, or Susie.  In our example, we’ll call him Jimmy.

You’d always see Jimmy walking around, with a packet of Oreos or a bag of potato chips in his grasp, feasting on high fructose corn syrupy goodness, after putting away an artery clogging, heart stopping, triple cheeseburger, with onion rings and a 44 oz. Coke. 

But one thing we never thought of Jimmy – he wasn’t very threatening.  When he got mad because people picked on him, he’d try to chase you, but Jimmy couldn’t run more than 20 feet before gasping for air and doubling over (like that was a sight we ever wanted to see).  Jimmy would cry, go home, and drown his sorrow in a family size bag of M&M’s with a 2 liter Coke chaser before playing Nintendo for six hours straight to help him cope with his image issues.

But evidently, Michelle Obama thinks Jimmy is a threat to the security of the United States because he can’t join the military.  He couldn’t scale a wall higher than three feet, but he can certainly the folks at The Pentagon a bit worried.  Michelle Obama is worried about it too.

But when the aptly named “Fruit-Of-The-Kaboom” bomber attempted to blow up a plane by hiding the bomb making materials in his BVD’s, the Obamas were soaking it up in Hawai’i.  But did they cut their vacation short in the face of an act (albeit failed) of terror?  Not a chance.  However, had George Bush pulled something like that, he’d be read the riot act by the liberals in Congress.  

Perhaps the only thing stupider than all this, and this is quite a reach, is the Harrisonburg Police Department bringing felony charges against two, 21 year olds, for throwing snowballs at cars.  Evidently, the actual charge is that they are “throwing missiles” (unlawful shoot/throw)

Well, that’s it then.  Fat Jimmy is a threat to national security.  Lob a snowball at him.

Just when liberals reach their maximum levels of stupidity, they find a way to push the envelope of the ridiculous.


* Quoting Michelle Obama: “For the first time in my adult life, I am proud of this country.”, which is just as amusing that she’s the First Lady.  Magnus the Dog tells me he likes the nickname.

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Written by Rick

February 11, 2010 at 4:01 pm

One Response

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  1. What you may have missed (because I obviously have no idea when or where you went to school), is that it’s not just one or two fat kids anymore. If you walk the halls of public schools, you’ll spot dozens of energy drink hammering, pot-gut having, man-boob sagging, video game playing fat kids. I should know: I’m under 30 and I’m a “fat kid Jimmy” to this day because I set up a terrible set of habits as a kid and despite regular exercise. It’s going to be years before I get my body straitened out. Yes, M.O.’s efforts will probably be fruitless, but the issue she’s blathering on about is not imaginary. Parents don’t let their kids outside to play anymore, PE and recess are being cut all across the country, and kids are often taught that hard work and sweat are things that are below them. And think about it: We have a hard enough time finding kids who are willing to join the military. If we didn’t, why would we need multimedia, high-dollar advertising pushing military service on the internet, TV, and radio? Why would we want to continue to promote a sedentary lifestyle that produces lard-assed kids like me who couldn’t get in when we tried.

    Ben

    June 9, 2010 at 7:16 am


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